Olivia's Marathon Misadventures

Friday, April 07, 2006

Pet Peeves and Mood Rings

This morning brought a new day, a cool breeze and that occasional yen for a tall cup of Starbucks coffee. On the mornings that I drink coffee (usually the mornings following the evenings that I make good friends with a bottle of wine), which I have really cut down on since Christmas except for this week, I customarily make it at home. Typically I don't drink all that I make, but enjoy the aroma in my apartment.

Today, today I didn't want to mess around with grinders and filters and filtered water and all that hassle. So I do my morning routine - save getting dressed, I wore my walking clothes to work today - and drive down the street to my friendly neighborhood Starf*cks for a cuppa. This place is about .25m from my house, but it is in the very heart of West End, so tra-ffic-y. Lazy, lazy, lazy I go through the drive thru...I don't want anything fancy, just a cup of coffee. Everyone in front of me is getting half-caff-no-fat-mochas-with-soy-whip or whatever. Me, plain ol' coffee. I place my order and pull around...when I get to the window, I am not kidding, it took 5 minutes. TO. POUR. COFFEE. [grrr] I slip on my mood ring that I keep in my car for entertainment, in case the morning commute proves to much for my already highly strung sensibilities, and see that it is ink black (= tense). Hmm, let's add some caffeine to that.

As I head on to work, I listen to a little Madonna. I am so amped up about her summer tour! YAY! Feeling better, mood ring says purple - purpose is known. Yep. I know I am going to work. Driving to work, I start to pass a USPS semi-truck. Oops. I need to mail some stuff. Anyway, this is also very close to the split where I need to take the ramp on the right. Hm. I decide I'll just whip around the semi as quickly as I can. Not in the cards. Some IDIOT safe driver is going the same speed as the semi. I CAN'T PASS! ERGH! This is my biggest pet peeve. So we go on and on like this. This stinking beeyotch won't pass the truck and I can't get over. I flash her my head lights and motion for her to get over...she IS in the passing lane after all. My eyes catch a glimpse of my mood ring: BLACK. Figures.

At this point, I can't slow down and get over behind the semi, too many cars are stacked up behind me. So I have to be a little aggressive. I flash my lights and wave my hands and ride that slut's her bumper. She has the NERVE to roll down her window and flash 55 at me.

No joke? The speed limit is 55? Really? Is that what that sign with two large 5s on it means? I think it is ok to go a little FASTER in the passing lane in order to pass a SEMI TRUCK when you are COMING UP ON A HIGHWAY SPLIT!!!!!!!! Seriously.

She manages to put the pedal to the metal and crank out a blistering 58mph so I could get around the semi truck who thankfully slowed down - noticing the fussy woman riding the bumper of the moron who doesn't know how to use the passing lane. Once I made it past her front bumper I flipped her the bird waved good-bye. Mood ring: purple. Hellz yeah it is.

2 Comments:

  • Nashville drivers are the WORST!! I hate being tense by the time I get to work!

    By Blogger Rae, at 9:02 AM  

  • you're good. you are really really good.

    By Blogger jeanne, at 4:49 PM  

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